On Halloween, I adopted 2 kittens from the Humane Society. It wasn’t an impulsive action; I’ve half-joked about becoming a crazy cat lady since my divorce. I already have a pretty good handle on the crazy part, so I just needed a few more cats.
Well, I thought the kittens were adorable, but my sons’ seven-year-old cats were not so impressed. Though technically not my cats, these litter mates sleep in my bed (most of the time) and have trained me fairly well.
My therapy assignment to find things that make me happy is never far from my mind. I have a problem with the word “happy” though. Happy is like a mirage; you think you have it only to find out you don’t. Happy results from circumstances, which are ever-changing. Over the last week, several occurrences have affirmed what brings me lasting joy. The fact I can recall them easily is a sign I’m on the right track.
- I got to surprise someone I hardly knew with an anonymous gift and I still smile when I think of her reaction.
- I had Thanksgiving dinner at my house… my ex, his girlfriend, her son and my 2 sons were the guests. Calling a truce on the past animosity concerning his mother made extending this olive branch easier. Of course I still don’t trust him, but at least this opens the door to forgiveness so I can finally be free.
- I encountered a woman seated behind me crying in church. In the past, I would’ve pretended not to notice because it’s awkward, but I surprised myself and asked if she was okay. The woman said no. I moved to a seat beside her and asked if she wanted to talk but she didn’t. I’ve prayed about her often today, and I hope maybe by acknowledging her she didn’t feel so alone.
I notice the things that stay with me most are instances where I can make a difference for others. I have always wanted to be a positive person and lift others up, but honestly, I’ve been stuck in my own pain for so long, I forgot how to do that. I think that’s why my last blog died: I couldn’t say anything nice (positive) so I said nothing at all. I think to help me, I need to help others.
Like the evolution of the relationship between the 4 cats in my house, I am a work in progress. Progress isn’t perfection… however, it’s a move in the right direction and I’ll take it 🙂